


Not-So-Little Boy Blue

by ballsdeepinwinchesters



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Bottom Sam, Bottoming from the Top, Butt Plugs, Codependency, Come Sharing, Come Swallowing, Established Relationship, Felching, Fluff and Angst, Hair-pulling, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Marking, Masturbation, POV Sam Winchester, Panty Kink, Phone Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rimming, Sam Winchester at Stanford, Sibling Incest, Sibling Love, Smut, Spanking, Stanford Era, Top Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-10
Updated: 2016-01-10
Packaged: 2018-05-12 23:01:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5684479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ballsdeepinwinchesters/pseuds/ballsdeepinwinchesters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the outside, Sam probably looks like a vanilla guy. He’s been told he’s got that whole “twink” thing going for him, what with the floppy bangs, lanky arms and tight physique. He’s got “good old-fashioned American boy” written all over him. He partially resents that label, mostly because he’s still kind of bitter about hitting his growth spurt later than other guys in school, so he got picked on a little bit longer than they did. The other part of him that <i>doesn’t </i>resent the label, though… Well, let’s just say that part recognizes how hot his perky, tan ass looks covered in pastel satin and lace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not-So-Little Boy Blue

On the outside, Sam probably looks like a vanilla guy. He’s been told he’s got that whole “twink” thing going for him, what with the floppy bangs, lanky arms and tight physique. He’s got “good old-fashioned American boy” written all over him. He partially resents that label, mostly because he’s still kind of bitter about hitting his growth spurt later than other guys in school, so he got picked on a little bit longer than they did. The other part of him that _doesn’t_ resent the label, though… Well, let’s just say that part recognizes how hot his perky, tan ass looks covered in pastel satin and lace.

_

Maybe Sam’s a little fucked up. Not for the panty thing, that’s pretty much just a part of him at this point, but for the other things. The fact that he gets hot under the collar when he’s in class and someone looks at him for too long while he’s got a plug rubbing at his prostate the whole time, for example. Sometimes he’ll work with his professor a little closer than necessary, and get himself worked up over the idea of his professor bending him over the desk and spanking him with a ruler. Mostly, Sam’s a little fucked in the head because he gets off thinking about his brother.

Who can blame him, though? Anyone who’s seen Dean has probably thought up a fantasy or two. He’s a freckle-covered sun god with eyes reminiscent of grass in the summertime, and lips pink and plump. Just the way he smiles sometimes… The slow, cocky spread of his lips into a grin, and then he has the audacity to lick his lips and slowly drag his teeth over his bottom lip. The thought of that alone is enough to send a shiver up Sam’s spine. Contrasting to Sam, Dean looks like he’d be a kinky little shit, but he’s more vanilla than people give him credit for. Don’t get him wrong, Dean’s still pretty kinky, it’s just not like Sam. He likes being told what to do- always so quick to obey orders given their upbringing- and definitely won’t say no to being tied up or blindfolded, but he pretty much just lets Sam go wild with his fantasies, just sitting back and enjoying the ride (literally or otherwise).

Dean’s a pretty perfect human specimen, but it’s more than that. He’s _Dean_. He’s been there Sam’s whole life, and no matter how much they get on each other’s nerves sometimes, it’s always been them. Sam and Dean against the world, like they’ve said since they were kids making far-off plans on the floor of their motel room. Sam knows it’s crazy and a million different shades of fucked up, but for the life of him, he can’t imagine a life where he and Dean don’t belong to each other.

The mildly bothersome sensation of a lace string up his ass is what brings his attention back to present reality. Sam tightens up and fidgets in his seat, trying not to draw too much attention to himself. Somehow, moving made the plug in his ass move around and get the string of the thong in an even more uncomfortable place. Sam clears his throat as quietly as possible, bringing his hand up to his chin and adjusts in his seat again. He locks his ankles together and clenches his chin tighter, willing himself to pay attention to the lesson and get it off of the incessant pressure being applied to his prostate.

Obviously, he hasn’t been too inconspicuous because his friend Brady clears his throat and leans over his desk behind Sam and puts his head almost touching Sam’s shoulder. “Panties too tight today, Winchester?” Brady asks quietly, only for him to hear. Sam glances over at him from the corner of his eyes, and Brady turns a little to give Sam a wicked grin and a wink. Sam huffs and shakes his head, slouching a little further in his seat and blushing a little under the collar of his shirt. He hears Brady chuckle and he leans back into his seat. A second later, he feels the toe of Brady’s shoe nudging his spine at his lower back and sliding up to lift the hem of his shirt. Sam reaches back to slap Brady’s foot away, and he hears Brady chuckle again. “Blue always did look good on you,” he hears the blonde boy mention.

“You think I don’t know that?” Sam tosses over his shoulder. Brady gives him another laugh and nudge to his back. Though they stopped hooking up after Dean made a very adamant demand for monogamy after a drunken fit of jealousy one night, Sam and Brady remained friends. Brady still has it in his head that Sam will cave, but Sam’s devotion to his older brother is a lot stronger than most people realize.

Class can’t end soon enough. It’s Sam’s last class of the week and he’s been planning this night for way too long. Dean hasn’t been able to visit for almost two months; he’s been working hunts back-to-back, and they just haven’t been able to find the time, but Dean promised he would spend the weekend with Sam. Given, Sam _made_ him promise he would stay all weekend, but it was a promise nonetheless. Dean’s going to get the night of his life, and Sam could really use this, too.

He barely notices when his professor dismisses their class, but he’s one of the first people out of the room. He gets on his bike- which, in retrospect, riding his bike was probably not the best idea- and heads straight for his apartment off-campus. Sam’s practically vibrating, partially from excitement and partially because his ass keeps bumping the bike seat and causing the plug in his ass to thrust not-so-gently against his prostate. When he gets back to the apartment, it’s time to set up for the night.

Dean pretends he’s not one for romance, that he’s a caveman, grunt-and-grind type of guy, but Sam knows Dean can appreciate a scented candle or two. So, after he finishes cleaning up the apartment- knowing Dean likes the apartment clean, and Sam doesn’t want to hear an earful of how messy he is this weekend- he takes the time to light two candles by his bed.

Sam goes into the bathroom and gives himself a once-over, making sure his hair is nice and fluffy, and his tanned skin is looking nice under his shirt. He hears his cellphone ring, and he answers it without looking at the caller ID. “Dean?”

“Heya, Sammy,” Dean’s voice comes from the other end of the phone. He’s in a good mood, and Sam smiles. “How’s my boy?”

“No complaints,” Sam returns with a small laugh. “Are you almost here?”

Dean sucks in a deep breath and Sam’s heart drops into his stomach. _Here it comes._ “Bad news.”

“Again? _Really?_ ” Sam doesn’t bother hiding the disappointment in his voice. He leans against the bathroom counter with his back to the mirror, crossing his arms over his chest. “It’s been _months_ , Dean.”

“I know, I know. I ran into a small problem with some guys here-”

“Are you okay?”

He hears a breathy chuckle come from the other end. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Sam barely has time to feel relieved before Dean continues. “It’s just looking like I won’t be able to make it over your way this weekend.” Sam grits his teeth behind tightly pressed lips and makes no effort to respond. “Sammy?”

“You promised, Dean.” His brother sighs into the phone. “I’m sick of this. I just…” Sam shrugs to himself. “I miss my brother.”

“I miss you, too, Sam,” Dean grumbles into the receiver. Sam can just picture Dean sitting and leaning with his elbows on his knees, rubbing his thumb and fingers into the corners of his eyes and over the bridge of his nose, beating himself up for disappointing Sam again. Sam hates the image in his head, but he can’t help being upset. Being away from Dean this long was the worst part of leaving for college. Sure, he could get away from Dad, and get out of hunting, and Dean would follow him to the ends of the Earth to see him, but it still came with its pitfalls- not being able to see Dean all times of the day being one of those. “We’ll reschedule.”

“Yeah. Yeah, we’ll reschedule,” Sam says flatly. He pushes himself off the counter and walks aimlessly around the dark adjacent bedroom. “You’re _sure_ you can’t make it?”

Dean lets out a small laugh. “Sorry, baby boy, looks like it’s another weekend with your vibrator.”

“You say it like it’s a bad thing,” Sam mumbles lightheartedly. Dean chuckles again, and Sam smiles to himself. _We can do this. Everything’s fine. What’s another weekend?_ “Where are you?”

“Somewhere in the sticks of Wyoming,” Dean answers. “Pretty fuckin’ boring if you ask me.”

“No, I mean, like, _where_ are you right now?”

“Oh, I’m in the Impala. Nothin’ special. Why? Where are you right now?”

A smile twitches at the corners of Sam’s lips as he lays down on the bed. “In my bedroom, just, y’know… Laying down.” Sam pauses. “ _Nothin’ special,_ ” he adds in a quieter, teasing tone.

“Oh yeah?” Dean asks with obviously piqued interest. “Well, hell, that sounds a lot better than Wyoming already.” Sam grins and draws shapes on his thigh absently. “What are you wearing?”

“It was supposed to be a surprise, but I guess now you’ll never know,” Sam replies with an exaggerated sigh. Dean groans. “Sorry. Maybe I’ll wear it next time.” Sam pauses and hums. “Maybe not.”

“You’re such a tease,” Dean mumbles. Sam nods to himself. _I know._ “Come on, Sammy. Work with me here.”

Sam lets out a small sigh. “ _Fine._ I'm wearing a t shirt… jeans… panties…”

Dean’s breath hitches a little at the word. “The pink pair?”

“No, these are new.” Sam lazily lets his fingertips graze the waistband of his jeans and up his abdomen. “They're blue.”

“You always looked good in blue,” Dean mentions breathily. “Boyshorts? Satin?”

“Lace thong.” Sam’s words obviously get some sort of rise out of Dean, judging by his groan. “Wish I could show you. I bought them just for you.”

“Baby, I wish I could see ‘em. You have no idea how much.”

Sam does have an idea, though. He knows what Dean likes, and he knows what he’s doing. “You know, uh…you know what I did this morning, Dean?” Dean hums in response. “I was thinking about tonight, and I got excited, and impatient. I fingered myself in the shower.”

“Oh yeah?” Sam hums and nods even though Dean can't see him. “Thinkin’ ‘bout me, I hope.”

“And if I wasn't?” Sam only teases Dean to get him riled up, and it always works. Dean doesn't respond further than a grunt. The corners of Sam’s lips twitch into a grin again. “It was you, Dean. Always you. I wished it was you in the shower with me. I miss feeling you touch me.”

“God, I miss _touching you_.”

“I miss your hands... your cock,” Sam adds in a lower voice. Sam runs his hand down the front of his jeans and grips his inner thigh. “I fucked myself on my fingers pretending it was you. I jerked off and called out your name.”

“Fuck, that's hot, Sammy,” Dean comments quietly.

Sam can feel the hardness of his cock straining against the tight lace of his panties, but he keeps his hands on himself over his jeans. “When I got out, I put in that plug you like.”

“The crystal one?” Dean rushes out, probably quicker than he intends to. Sam hums an affirmation and Dean lets out a half-sigh, half-chuckle. “You're killin’ me, Sammy.”

“Yeah, well, you deserve it for ditching me this weekend.”

“Nobody deserves this kinda torture.”

Sam grins and grips his thigh again. “When’s the last time you thought about me?”

“Pretty hard to think about anything else with the picture you're painting for me.”

“Come on, Dean. When’s the last time you jerked off?”

Dean laughs a little. “Earlier today. I was thinkin’ about that time you tied me to your headboard for 24 hours.”

Sam chuckles fondly at the memory. “That was a good day. Mm, next time you visit, I'll have to keep you tied up so you can't leave.”

“That doesn't sound half bad.” A comfortable silence falls over the line. “I keep thinking how pretty you must look bent over in that blue thong with the crystal plug in your ass.”

“You touching yourself thinking about it?”

“Can't right now, wish I could. _Believe me_. Wouldn't object to you getting off, though.” Sam licks his lips and chews on the inside of his lip, toying the button of his jeans open. “Touch yourself for me, baby.” Sam puts his fingers under the hem of his jeans and presses his palm to his straining erection. He sucks in a deep, ragged breath and stretches his shoulders back against the bed. He moves his hand to appreciate the lace fabric on his skin and closes his eyes. “That feel good, Sammy?”

Sam closes his eyes and uses his long fingers to cover the length of his groin. “Yeah, Dean,” he breathes. He presses his hand down a little firmer and rolls his hips up into the touch, a small groan coming from the back of his throat.

Sam can hear Dean let out a breath right into the receiver. “What would you do if I was there with you? Tell me.”

“I want your hands all over me, Dean, I want you to show me how much you miss me. Kiss every inch of my body,” Sam says the words in a low voice, focusing his mind on his hand slowly kneading his clothed cock. “I want you to see how hot I look for you.”

“God,” Dean groans. “I bet you look so pretty for me.”

“Just for you, Dean. You’re the only one who gets to see me like this.” Sam grips himself tighter and bites his bottom lip, rolling his hips up into his hand. “You’re the only one who gets to touch me, the only one who can fuck me. I’m all yours, Dean.”

“Goddamn right you are,” Dean practically breathes from the other end of the phonecall. Sam’s skin feels hotter instantly; he loves appealing to Dean’s overwhelming possessiveness because it gets him so hot. They belong to each other, and each other _only_. The idea of marking each other up in obvious spots on their body just to ward off other people- so the world knows they belong to each other- sparks the fire in the pit of Sam’s gut. Sam lets out a small sigh as he finally reaches two fingers below the waistband of his thong. “You sound so pretty for me, baby boy. Tell me what else you want me to do.”

“I want you to suck my dick while you take me apart with your fingers,” Sam spills out as he reaches a firm hand around his shaft. “I want you, _fuck_ , I want you to, _mmnuh_ ,” Sam bites down on a moan when the pull of fabric against his plug pushes it deeper inside him.

“I’m gonna make you cum, baby. I want you to cum in my mouth, let you taste yourself.” Sam can’t help the moan that rises in his chest at that. “-And then I’m gonna eat you out and finger you till you’re hard again.” A blurt of precome drips from the tip of Sam’s cock at Dean’s words, and Sam groans loudly. He squeezes his cock quickly before stroking himself again. “You want that?”

“ _Fuck yeah_ , Dean. I wanna suck your cock, too; I wanna taste you so badly.” As weird as it sounds, Sam misses the taste of Dean’s cock, the weight of it on his tongue. Sam misses the smell that’s so indescribably _Dean_. He needs it. Sam’s hand quickens on himself, and his chest heaves as he feels himself inching closer. Sam can’t fight back the moans and sighs he’s making. “How are you gonna fuck me, Dean?”

“I want you to leave those panties on while you ride me. I’m gonna push the string aside and pull you down on my cock. You’re gonna ride me like it’s the last thing you’re gonna do, until you can’t even breathe, Sammy.” Dean’s last sentence is drowned out by the guttural groan that escapes the back of Sam’s throat. Sam moans and squeezes his eyes shut tighter, his torso arching off the bed. He can picture holding onto Dean and fucking himself down on his brother’s cock, rutting fervently against each other. He can practically feel Dean’s strong hands on his hips, holding onto him and pulling the lace fabric against his cock tightly. The image is enough to send Sam teetering on the edge of climax. “Don’t cum just yet, baby boy.”

Sam makes a questioning noise at Dean’s words, but slows his hand anyways. “Come on, Dean, I’m so close.” Sam chooses to ignore the whine in his own voice, too far gone in his fantasy to care.

Dean’s low, breathy chuckle bleeds through the receiver and Sam’s cock twitches with interest. A rush of air escapes Sam’s chest. “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna leave you hangin’,” Dean returns quietly. Sam makes a defiant noise as he squeezes his cock to fend off his orgasm. He puts the cell phone between his ear and shoulder, and uses his newly free hand to pull up his t shirt on his chest, and tug down his jeans. Now, Sam can admire the navy lace fabric straining against his achingly hard cock, messy with the wetness of his precome. “Can’t hear you, Sammy.”

Sam reaches his other hand in his pants and presses his plug further inside him, and lets out a raspy groan. “It’s so good, Dean- _God_ , I wish it was you.” Sam jerks himself harder and plays with the plug, and lets out a moan. “ _Fuck, Dean_ ,” Sam breathes before biting down on his lip.

Another moan gets choked off in his throat when he’s startled by the sound of someone trying to open his front door. He sits up suddenly, taking his hands out of his pants and immediately going into defense mode. He pauses for a second, listening until the sound starts again. “Hold on a second, Dean,” Sam whispers into the phone.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asks in a quiet voice.

“I think- I think someone’s breaking in,” Sam answers as he stands up. Sam pulls his pants up and tip-toes into the hallway. With his body pressed against the wall and his heart which was previously racing from arousal, now pounding from anticipation, he peers around the corner and squints at the window above the door. He can barely make out the top of the person’s head from the darkness of the house and night sky behind them. “I’ll call you back.”

“Are you sure-”

Dean’s question is cut off when Sam ends the call and stuffs his phone in his pocket. Sam braces himself against the wall when he hears the final click of the door being unlocked. _Couldn’t wait ten minutes to break in, could you? Of course not. Now I’m gonna have blue balls while I fight this guy._ Sam laughs humorlessly to himself and rolls his eyes. _Can’t I catch a break?_

Finally, the door handle turns slowly, the person on the other side obviously trying to be quiet. Sam clenches his jaw and prepares to jump on them. The person- a guy, from what Sam can make out- comes inside and eases the door shut, ducking his head when it makes a clicking sound and shuts. Sam curses himself for not having turned any lights on in his apartment, wishing he could see the person’s face. It would certainly ease the sound of blood pounding in his ears.

The person attempts to tread lightly across the hardwood floors and heads in Sam’s direction. Sam braces himself fully against the wall, concealing himself. Sam breathes quietly, focusing his senses on listening to the quiet _tap, tap_ of the man’s boots on the wood floor. Sam senses the man being nearby, and his footsteps come to a stop.

Sam quickly decides to lunge around the corner and grab the man by the collar and push him against the wall. Taken by surprise, the other man falters and hits the wall with a hard _thud_. He makes a pained grunt before grabbing one of Sam’s wrists and twisting as he pushes at Sam’s other arm, twisting their bodies around. The other man must’ve put out his foot to catch Sam’s and trip him because Sam falls to the ground on his back. He feels his head smack against the unforgiving wood floor and he squeezes his eyes shut at the pain. Sam shoves his forearm up and straight to the other man’s throat as he swipes his leg to knock the man’s leg out from under him, using his momentum to turn them so the other man ends up on his back.

Panting hard, Sam recognizes the voice behind the breathless chuckle coming from the man under him. He cocks his head and squints at him through the dark questioningly. “Dean?”

The other man shakes with a low laugh. “Surprise, little brother,” Dean manages to say in a raspy voice, Sam’s forearm pressed to his windpipe having messed up his voice.

Sam’s face finally breaks into a grin and Dean clears his throat, pointing to Sam’s unmoving arm. “Oh yeah, sorry.” Sam moves his arm and stands up, holding out his hand to help Dean up. “What are you doing here?” As soon as Dean’s on his feet, Sam’s wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling his brother in for a tight hug.

Dean’s arms clap him on the back and squeeze just as tight. “I made you a promise, didn’t I?” Sam feels relief and happiness wash over him as the two stand connected and swaying in the middle of the hallway. Sam squeezes his eyes shut and takes a moment to bury his face in face in the crook of Dean’s neck, breathing in the smell he’s been missing for too long- leather, faint cologne, natural musk, and everything so unique to Dean. No matter where they are, how long they’ve been apart, or how Sam’s been feeling, that smell always brings him right back home.

Sam lets out something reminiscent of a laugh out of sheer happiness and releases Dean from their embrace. “I thought you couldn’t make it,” he says as he begins to walk backwards towards the bedroom, Sam’s hands sliding down Dean’s arms and finding his hands.

The faint candlelight from the bedroom down the hall slowly starts lighting up Dean’s features and Sam can finally see the familiar grin he’s being given. Dean chuckles and pulls Sam flush to his chest, holding onto Sam’s waist as they continue gracelessly walking to the bedroom. “A guy can’t surprise his favorite brother anymore?” Sam watches as Dean speaks, examining the way the pink lips form each sound. Sam bites down on another smile and tips his chin down to finally capture Dean’s lips with his own.

The kiss is slow and tender at first, full of meaning and a lifetime of familiarity. As soon as Dean reaches up to hold the back of Sam’s neck and run his thumbs over Sam’s cheekbones, though, a switch flips and Sam’s heartbeat picks up speed. Sam deepens their kiss with a breathy moan, almost too quiet for even him to hear, and fists his hands in the lapel of Dean’s leather jacket and tugs Dean closer to him.

Sam’s knees hit the edge of his bed and he goes with gravity, falling back onto the bed and pulling Dean with him. His back smacks the mattress hard enough for him to let out a partly muffled grunt against Dean’s lips. Dean kisses him rougher, straddling Sam’s lap and rolling their bodies together. Sam slides his hands under Dean’s jacket and pushes it over Dean’s shoulders, and Dean takes the cue to shuck it off. Dean sits up, putting his weight down on Sam’s crotch and with a heaving chest, takes off his shirt and tosses it aside.

Sam finally sees Dean’s face fully illuminated by the candlelight and has to focus when a swollen, darkened area catches his attention. “Dean-” he starts quietly, not having caught his breath yet. Sam sits up and reaches a tentative hand up to Dean’s face. The black eye looks pretty bad, but not as bad as the cut on Dean’s cheek. Sam’s fingers lightly touch the skin near the cut and Dean winces a little. His brother snatches his wrist and holds it away from his face. “Dean, what happened?”

“Don’t worry about it.” Dean doesn’t meet his eyes. Sam gives him a stern look and Dean rolls his eyes. “I promise it’s nothing, Sam,” Dean adds more sincerely. The hand that was holding tightly onto Sam’s wrist goes soft and Dean’s thumb grazes over Sam’s veins. “Don’t let it ruin tonight, baby. Please?” Sam keeps his mouth tight and sighs harshly out his nose. Dean tries to give him puppy dog eyes and bats his eyelashes. Sam tilts his head and lets his eyes wander over his brother’s new injuries.

Dean brings Sam’s hand to his lips and kisses Sam’s knuckles, still giving him that doughy look. “ _Dean_ ,” Sam sighs.

Dean rolls his hips down onto Sam’s crotch, kissing each of Sam’s knuckles individually. Sam lets out something halfway between a sigh and a laugh and shakes his head. “Come on, Sammy.” Sam decides to let it go for now because Dean was right; he shouldn’t let it ruin their first night together after so long apart. Sam lets Dean pull him into a kiss and Dean holds Sam’s face in his hands, pulling on his lips softly with his own. Dean’s hands fall to Sam’s tee shirt and he tugs Sam’s bottom lip between his teeth as he reaches a hand under the fabric. “I heard from a little birdy that you look really pretty under all these clothes,” Dean murmurs against Sam’s lips. “Let me see.”

Sam nods, and Dean rolls off of Sam’s lap to sit with his back to the wooden headboard. Sam stands to the side of the bed and lowers his head, looking up at Dean from behind his floppy, brunette fringe. Sam slowly lifts up from the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head and dropping it to the ground beside him.

Dean licks his lips and bites down, nodding to himself. Sam smiles inwardly, loving the way Dean watches him so intensely. Sam’s fingers find the button of his jeans and he takes his time to pop the button open, watches the way Dean’s chest hitches when the button opens. He slowly drags the zipper down and relishes in the look in Dean’s eyes when he spots the blue lace. Sam can tell when Dean starts holding his breath as Sam slowly pushes his jeans down. Sam grins and turns around, bending all the way over to push his jeans past his calves and step out of them. “Goddamn, baby boy,” Dean mumbles in a low voice from behind him.

Sam turns back around and crawls onto the bed, kneeling in front of Dean. Sam runs his hands up his own thighs- head tilted down and watching himself do so- and over his lace-covered hardness. His hand continues up his abdomen and he peeks up from behind his bangs to look at his brother. “Do you like them, Dean?” Sam’s voice is even and low, and Dean nods eagerly, not being able to tear his eyes away from the fabric.

Dean gets up to his knees and reaches out for Sam, grazing his hand over the same path Sam’s hands had paved- up his thighs and over the lace of his thong. Sam’s breath hitches in his throat and Dean catches Sam’s small gasp with his lips. Dean presses his palm over Sam’s clothed cock and rubs him slow and rhythmically, matching the pace his kiss is setting. Sam groans and wraps his hands around Dean’s neck, tugging him closer. “That feel good, Sammy?” Dean asks in a deep voice, pressing the words into Sam’s parted lips. Sam nods and kisses him harder, rolling his hips into Dean’s touch.

Dean’s other hand snakes up the back of Sam’s thighs and up to his ass. The large, calloused hand gives him a squeeze before going between his cheeks and finding the plug in his ass. Sam feels Dean grin against his lips before nipping at Sam’s bottom lip and pushing the plug deeper inside of Sam. A shudder runs up Sam’s body with a moan and he lets his head fall back. Dean takes advantage of the exposed column of his neck and attaches his mouth to his skin. Sam chants Dean’s name in a quiet prayer, holding on tighter to his brother and losing himself in Dean’s manipulations.

They slowly lower to the bed with Sam on his back and Dean naturally seats himself between Sam’s legs. Dean rolls his hips up into Sam’s and lets his hands roam over Sam’s body, relearning every inch of him as if he didn’t already know it as well as his own. Dean bites down on the sensitive skin where Sam’s neck meets his shoulder and Sam groans. “Sound so good for me, baby,” Dean praises into the skin of Sam’s collarbone. Dean’s lips trail a pattern of faint bruises down Sam’s neck and sternum. Dean's hands move up Sam’s sides, over his biceps, his forearms and their fingers slide together, fitting like two matching puzzle pieces.

Dean’s tongue dances back and forth between Sam’s nipples, toying with each one between his lips. His hips never give up their long, rolling dance against Sam’s groin, and Sam’s feeling dizzy with arousal. Dean grazes his teeth over the sensitive skin of Sam’s ribcage and his hands guide Sam’s to rest on the back of Dean’s neck. Their fingers slide apart and Dean shimmies his body down the bed, kissing and sucking on every inch of skin he can get his mouth on. “ _God_ , Dean,” Sam groans as Dean bites down on a kiss to Sam’s hipbone. Dean grins against his skin and does it again, now bringing his hand up Sam’s thigh and to the blue lace tightly formed against his cock. “ _Dean_.” Sam can't be bothered to care about the whining tone of his voice when he's been on edge for this long.

Dean’s responding guttural groan is immediately pulled from him, his hand tightening over the fabric of Sam’s panties and pulling down. “ _Fuck_ , Sammy, what are you doing to me?” Dean asks rhetorically in a hushed tone, biting the words into Sam’s happy trail. He only pulls the panties just low enough for Sam’s aching hardness to stand free. Sam grips his brother’s hair at the top of his head and watches as Dean kisses his way to his cock, tasting every inch of his skin as promised.

Those green, familiar eyes- though one impeded by slight, purple swelling- flicker up to meet Sam’s when Dean moves his lips to graze the underside of Sam’s dick, tantalizingly slowly with just a peek of tongue to his skin. The grip Sam has in Dean’s hair tightens and it's all Sam can do to keep his eyes from rolling back. Dean’s perfect pink lips encircle the head of his cock and Dean shoots him a quick wink before swallowing him down. The air rushes out of Sam’s chest almost immediately, and Sam holds onto Dean’s confidently bobbing head tightly in an attempt to keep himself grounded. “ _Fuck fuck fuck yeah_ ,” Sam chants between broken moans. “Oh my God.” Dean’s hands press down firmly on Sam’s hips, his fingernails digging into Sam’s skin hard enough to light up his nerves and drive his senses crazy. Sam can't help it when his head falls back and he starts pushing his hips up eagerly seeking more of Dean’s mouth.

When he feels Sam’s hips urging up, Dean stops moving his head and licks quick circles around the head of Sam’s cock before pulling off with a wet pop. Dean fists his hand over Sam’s cock, spreading the accumulated wetness and breathes heavily against his skin. Sam looks back down at Dean as Dean presses more kisses onto Sam’s thighs. “You wanna fuck my mouth, baby?” Dean asks, never breaking eye contact.

In wordless response, Sam moves one of his hands to the underside of Dean’s chin and lets his thumb pull down on Dean’s lower lip. Sam bites down on his own lip as he watches Dean let him move him as he wishes. Sam’s thumb grazes over Dean’s bottom lip a little longer and Dean’s tongue peeks out to taste him. Sam lines his cock up with Dean’s lips and pushes Dean’s head down just low enough to make it easy for him to thrust into his mouth.

Dean’s eyes flutter shut as he lets himself be used to Sam’s liking. It's a rush, Dean giving over control like he does. It sparks a fire in Sam’s gut that gets him thrusting his cock up into Dean’s tight, hot mouth slowly only at first and then quick and harsh. “ _Fuck_ , De-” Sam’s voice chokes off on a moan when the vibrations from Dean’s groan shoot through him. Dean sucks harder as Sam’s pace increases, and Sam pushes Dean’s head down a little more and more to get deeper. “I'm so close, Dean, oh my God,” Sam rushes out helplessly. Dean hums in response, gripping the sheets on either side of Sam’s hips tightly, holding on for the ride. Sam pants and moans, squeezing his eyes shut as he chases his quickly rising orgasm, fucking into Dean’s lips with abandon. Dean sucks in his cheeks tighter and groans just enough to send Sam toppling over the edge and coming in Dean’s mouth. “ _Fuck! Fuck! Dean!_ ” Sam moans loudly, his hips sputtering. Dean hums again and Sam’s whole body shakes a little.

Sam lets go of Dean’s head and runs his hands up through his own hair, pushing his sweaty bangs off of his forehead. Dean slides back up Sam’s body and hovers over him. Sam watches as Dean swallows some of Sam’s cum, but leaves some in his mouth to tease from his lips to his tongue. Another wave of post-orgasmic arousal washes over Sam at the sight. Dean knows what Sam likes and gives it to him, even if he is a freak for it. Dean ducks his head down and parts his wet lips, his tongue seeking out Sam’s lips. Sam meets it with his own tongue and tastes himself on Dean, licking it off of his tongue. Dean chases it with a kiss and lets Sam fully taste the flavor of Dean’s lips. Sam sighs and digs his fingers into his brother’s back, wrapping his legs around Dean’s waist.

It’s a possessive fire burning in Sam’s gut as he tastes himself on Dean’s tongue, and that feeling fuels him on even more. Dean rolls his whole body down as he slots their bodies completely together, and the fabric of the denim of his jeans presses against Sam’s still-sensitive dick and makes him shiver. Dean’s hands sweep down Sam’s sides and hold onto the back of his thighs as they grind together. The feeling of Dean’s nails biting into his skin makes Sam gasp and Dean growls possessively at the noise.

It’s moments like these, moments where they’re so completely lost in each other that Sam couldn’t possibly imagine anything else, that he realizes how absolutely insane they must be. Then Dean rolls his groin against the plug in Sam’s ass in a long, a slow motion that matches the way he runs his tongue along Sam’s front teeth before sucking on Sam’s lip, and Sam’s train of thought is lost.

“You drive me crazy, you know that?” Dean whispers as he kisses over Sam’s jaw.

He takes a heavy breath and grazes his teeth along the sensitive skin, and Sam shudders. He rocks his hips up more urgently against Dean. “Yeah?”

Dean reconnects their lips instead of responding, kissing Sam so thoroughly it makes Sam dizzy. Dean taps Sam on the hips and pulls back. “Come on.” Sam nods and Dean sits up onto his knees to unbutton his jeans. He quickly shucks off his pants and boxers together, sits back and removes them all the way before tossing them across the room. Dean nods to him in silent direction, and when Sam gets close enough, Dean manhandles him until he’s where Dean wants him. Dean’s on his back and Sam’s on all fours on top of him, his knees on either side of Dean’s head and his lips line up with his brother’s cock.

Sam immediately licks Dean’s cock into his mouth and Dean’s hands grab ahold of Sam’s ass. Sam closes his eyes and wills himself to focus on his own mouth, but Dean’s kissing up the inside of Sam’s thighs and digging his fingers into the meat of his ass is distracting. Dean bites down gently on his skin as his fingers push aside the lace string of Sam’s thong and find the plug in his ass, pushing down on it. Sam rushes a deep breath out of his nose and pushes his hips back, urging Dean on. Dean huffs a breath and slowly starts taking the plug out, and Sam groans as his hips try to chase it.

Sam takes Dean’s cock in his mouth to the hilt and swallows around him and Dean lets out a groan against Sam’s skin. Sam takes a deep breath, relishing in the taste of his brother on his tongue. “ _Fuck_ , Sammy.” The end of his word is cut off when his lips find Sam’s hole, and Sam can’t hold back his moan. Dean’s hold on him tightens, gripping the string of his panties and holding it aside, and he presses his face further in Sam’s ass, licking at him eagerly. Sam’s brow tightens and he fists his hands in the sheets to keep himself sturdy. His mouth on Dean’s cock increases in pace as he sucks him harder, and Dean yanks Sam’s hips back hard, fucking his tongue in Sam’s ass.

Sam pulls his mouth off of Dean’s dick and presses his forehead against Dean’s thigh. “ _Oh my god, Dean_ ,” Sam all-but-whines. He feels Dean let out a low chuckle into his skin, but he makes no other response. Sam moans wantonly and pushes his hips back, seeking as much as Dean will give him. Dean’s hand sneaks beside his mouth and pushes two fingers directly into Sam. “ _Fuck!_ ”

“Goddamn, you sound so fucking pretty, baby boy,” Dean growls. Dean pushes his fingers in and out, aiming for that spot that makes Sam’s vision go spotty. Sam moans his brother’s name and fucks his hips back because it’s all he can seem to do. Dean presses his mouth back to Sam’s hole alongside his fingers and lands a smack on the swell of Sam’s ass. Sam lets out a loud cry, and Dean gives his ass a squeeze. “So fucking perfect.”

Sam takes Dean’s cock back in his mouth and bounces his head on Dean’s lap enthusiastically, the momentum of Dean’s fingers inside him pushing him back and forth. Dean’s groaning against his hole and sending the vibrations through his skin, and it’s driving Sam crazy. He’s almost completely hard again, and more than ready for Dean to take him.

Dean pulls his head back a little to spit on Sam’s ass before burying three fingers inside him. Sam pulls his mouth off Dean’s cock and lets out a harsh sob. “ _Dean_ \- fuck, fuck yeah,” he breathes heavily, letting his head fall forward. Dean lands another slap on Sam’s ass and Sam shudders, biting down on a moan. Dean rubs his hand over the place he slapped, gripping it and moving his mouth to bite kisses over his skin. Dean pulls back and spits on Sam’s hole again before chasing it with his mouth and burying his tongue inside Sam. Sam can’t help the whine he lets out, crying out his brother’s name.

Sam presses his mouth to Dean’s cock and pants against it, losing himself in the feeling of Dean’s fingers and his tongue on his ass. Dean gives his ass another slap without warning, and Sam lets out a broken groan. Suddenly, Dean was grabbing at his hips and pushing him aside. Sam falls to his back with a tiny protest of a noise rising up from his chest. Dean makes quick work of reaching to the nightstand for lubricant and squeezes some onto his hand. Sam doesn’t have much time to catch his breath before Dean’s between his legs, one hand slicking up his cock and the other shoving Sam’s panties aside, and pushing into Sam’s ass full-force. “ _Holy shit!_ ” Sam fists his hands into the sheets at his sides and throws his head back.

Dean’s hips take absolutely no time before they’re plowing into Sam at full-speed. Dean braces himself and hoists one of Sam’s legs over his shoulder. “ _Fuck_ , baby, you’re so tight,” Dean groans quietly, pressing the words into the skin of Sam’s knee on his shoulder. Dean dips down lower until their chests meet and he captures Sam’s lips in a kiss. Sam pants and groans as his brother fucks into him harshly, knocking the wind out of him with every deep thrust. He brings his hands up to frame the sides of Dean’s face as they kiss, holding on and bracing himself. “Goddamn, Sammy, you sound s-so fucking perfect, baby,” Dean grunts, pressing his forehead against Sam’s temple. Dean’s grip on the lace of Sam’s panties is tight, pulling the fabric harshly as he fucks into Sam harder. Sam wraps his around Dean and card his fingers through his big brother’s hair as they bury their faces in each other’s necks.

The heat between them is enough to start a fire, Sam’s sure of it. Moreso, it _is_ a fire. It’s a fire that nothing can dare put out. It’s always been that way. Ever since the first time, so tense and full of anxiety and fighting the worry of how horribly, disgustingly wrong it should feel- _put out the fire, ignore the heat, anything, anything to not get burned. Once you get that first scar, there’s no going back._ To the last time- where they’ve already learned every single inch of each other’s bodies, they know each other from the inside out, have become closer than any two creatures ever could or should- the heat between them has been enough to burn at the touch. Every touch, every kiss, leaves scars that never fade. The fire sears their skin, scars them in ways that ruin them for anyone else. Every time, they’re engulfed in the flames and emerge with matching burn marks that only they share, forever.

Sam’s gasping for air, feeling himself being swallowed whole by the heat that made its home between their bodies. Sam can’t breathe, and by the sound of Dean’s short, ragged grunts in his ear, Dean can’t either. “D-De- _hnn_ ,” Sam starts brokenly. “Sl- _fuck_ , slow down.”

It takes a moment for the words to register in Dean’s brain, blood pumping in their ears far too loud to listen properly. As soon as the words strike him, everything about Dean’s movements soften. His previously hard thrusts switch to long, soft rolls of his hips that make Sam’s eyes go cross. “You okay, baby?” Dean breathes heavily against Sam’s cheek. Dean kisses slowly from the lobe of his ear, over his cheekbones to his nose, and down to his lips. The kiss is soft enough to melt Sam from the inside out, make his eyes water unnecessarily. “Hm?” His big brother treats him like he’s delicate and in danger of breaking, just in case he’s hurt him, so afraid Sam can’t handle it- no matter how many times Sam’s proven that he can handle anything Dean can give him.

Sam nods, presses himself further in the tender kiss of his brother’s lips. “Yeah, yeah, just-” Dean pulls up just enough to look Sam in the eyes, and he reaches a hand up to gently sweep the sweat-matted bangs from his forehead. “I just don’t want it to be over yet.”

Dean’s lips part into a toothy grin and he leans back down to kiss Sam again. “Me neither,” Dean returns quietly. “Besides-” Dean gently bites down on Sam’s lower lip for a moment. “-I said you were gonna ride me, didn’t I?” Sam grins in return and flips them in an easy movement so he’s seated firmly on Dean’s lap.

He sits up higher, takes a moment to adore the cocky look on Dean’s face and he wonders just how long he’s been completely in love with his dork of a big brother. The familiar things about him- the deep green of his eyes and the stupid way he smiles when he thinks he’s won something- and the new scars he brings home after a hunt- the black eye and the cut on his cheek being the injuries of the day- remind Sam he’s never really _not_ been in love with absolutely everything about Dean. It’s not new information, his world isn’t rocked by it, but it’s still enough to make his heart feel like his brother’s reached right through his chest and squeezed it himself.

The moment is shoved aside along with the fabric of his panties, Dean wrapping his hand firmly around the lace and holding on tight. Sam starts his hips slow, rocking down onto Dean’s cock and pressing his hands onto the blush-red freckle-covered chest beneath him. Dean’s hands roam up Sam’s arms and over his collarbone affectionately. “So beautiful, baby boy,” he whispers. “Damn.”

Sam rocks his hips back more confidently, gaining a little speed and giving into the heat beneath his skin. When he sits up straighter, Dean’s cock hits the right spot and Sam’s losing it again. He squeezes his eyes shut and lets his lips fall open as he groans, louder with every harder fall of his hips. Bouncing up and down on his brother’s dick, chanting his name like a prayer, getting pulled down to meet every thrust even deeper by the hold Dean has on his blue lacey panties, Sam knows it shouldn’t feel as right as it does- as _fucking perfect_ as it does- but that doesn’t stop him. Hell, maybe it even spurs him on because Sam’s a fucking _freak_ anyways.

“ _Ah-ah-ah, D-Dean!_ ” Sam moans, voice breaking every time his hips crash down onto Dean’s. Dean groans a long string of filth, something about saying his name, Sam can’t hear it. The sound of their bodies slapping together quickly and feverishly drowns out the low growl of his brother’s voice. Dean’s hold on Sam’s panties tighten and pull to manhandle Sam as Dean puts his knees up so he can easily meet Sam’s thrusts with his own. Sam falls forward and wraps his arms under Dean’s and grabs onto the meat of Dean’s shoulders. “ _Oh_ , fuck me, fuck me-” Sam pants, pressing his head into the heat of Dean’s neck.

Dean uses the hand that doesn’t have a death grip on his thong to wrap around his back and grab a handful of Sam’s hair to hold him as Dean pounds into his ass. Sam moans louder, the sensation in his scalp lighting up every nerve in his body. “ _Fuck_ , Sammy, Sammy- soun-sound so f- _fucking_ hot, baby,” Dean grunts raggedly.

Dean holds Sam’s head back by the hair and attaches his mouth to Sam’s neck, teeth hitting his skin and lips sucking bruises and marks in the process. Sam makes a whine in the back of his throat and pushes his hips back as hard and fast as he can, getting Dean so deep inside him, he’s seeing stars and his vision is going dark. “ _God_ , like that- fuck! Fuck me, Dean- _fuck yeah, fuck me!_ ” The lace fabric of his panties is biting harshly into the base of his cock, so hard it’s pinching off Sam’s impending orgasm. It’s just more sensations that make his skin light up, and Sam’s completely overwhelmed by everything, moaning helplessly for his big brother to fuck him and never stop.

Dean’s pace quickens, and his grip on Sam tightens as they both lose themselves in the intensity of the fire inside them, unable to even think about slowing down. Just when Sam feels like he might black out from the pleasure-pain coursing through his veins, he hears fabric quickly rip and the lace tears, releasing the base of his cock from its vice grip and Sam’s orgasm hits him like a freight train. He chokes out a loud, guttural groan as his hips sputter and he spills his cum in between their bodies. “ _Dean_ \- oh, f- _fuck_ … Dean, holy shit, keep fucking me,” Sam breathes desperately. Dean lets out a low growl against Sam’s skin as he continues plowing his cock into Sam, now holding onto his back with both hands. “Don’t stop, Dean, don’t stop.”

Dean’s grunts and growls are muffled against Sam’s collarbone as he bites into his skin, gripping Sam tight and fucking him as hard as his body can move. Sam’s eyes roll back and finds himself wishing his brother would fuck him to death, but that’s probably a little extreme. “ _Sammy_ ,” Dean mewls, and it’s Dean who sounds so fucking pretty this time. The higher-pitched, breathy sound of his voice is like music to Sam’s ears; it means Dean can’t hold back and he’s close to coming as hard as Sam did. “ _Fuck_ , Sammy, baby, _oh my God_ ,” Dean practically whimpers into Sam’s skin, rambling a long string of terms of endearment and curses. “Oh, _Sammy, Sammy, baby, fuck, baby_ -” Dean bites a noise that resembles some sort of moan/sob hybrid down on Sam’s collarbone and buries his dick deep inside Sam.

Dean’s whole body shakes as his orgasm pulses through him, hips making short thrusts until he’s done. They’re both panting and drenched in sweat, still completely wrapped around each other. Dean moves his hands to Sam’s face, pushing back Sam’s bangs and catching his lips in a slow, chaste kiss. The sweetness of the kiss cuts the salty taste of sweat on his brother’s skin, and Sam wants to stay just like this forever- just laying in a post-coitus blissed-out daze, kissing long and slow with his soulmate. Dean’s thumbs graze Sam’s cheeks affectionately as they kiss, his lips and teeth moving with muted sweet nothings against Sam’s mouth.

After a length of time that could’ve been anywhere from five to thirty minutes, Sam pulls back and looks down at the completely peaceful face of his brother. The look Dean gives him is so fond, it tugs at Sam’s heart because he knows no two people could ever look at each other in quite the same way. Dean licks his bottom lip into his mouth before biting on it slowly. He leans up and presses another kiss to Sam’s lips. “You wanna taste yourself, baby boy?” Dean murmurs in a sinful voice, low and thick like molasses.

A shudder runs up Sam’s spine and he nods quickly. _God_ , Sam knows he’s dirty and too kinky for his own good, but Dean gives into all of his dirty secret pleasures. Dean’s an enabler, is what he is. Dean grins and tugs Sam’s bottom lip between his teeth as he pulls back. He slowly pulls his now-soft cock out of Sam, careful to keep Sam’s hips tipped upward. They both let out quiet moans as he does so. Dean moves out from under him and Sam leans forward on his elbows, tipping his ass up invitingly for Dean. He feels Dean chuckle against his sweat-coated skin and Dean’s hands run up the sides of his thighs before holding his cheeks apart. Dean’s tongue meet his hole, hot and flat, as he starts licking Sam out. “ _Dean_ ,” Sam groans softly, letting his head fall down against the bed.

Dean works his mouth on Sam’s ass like he kisses, and Sam’s whole body feels like it’s turning to mush. After he’s done licking Sam clean, he taps Sam’s side and Sam rolls on his back. Dean crawls on top of him and parts his lips to show Sam the cum on his tongue. Sam lets out a raspy breath, arousal churning deep in his chest. Dean dips his head down so their lips are almost touching and lets his tongue peek out, tracing over Sam’s lips teasingly. Sam shivers again, closing his eyes and holding back the urge to latch onto Dean’s mouth. Dean’s cum-painted tongue teases at Sam’s mouth a little longer before Dean _finally_ presses their mouths together and lets Sam really taste Dean’s cum.

A small whine comes from the back of his throat as the sour-sweet liquid slides between their tongues, and it’s so dirty, but Sam can’t help how hot it gets him. They kiss wet and sloppy, pushing the taste back and forth between them. Dean pulls his head back and Sam’s eyes go cross when he sees a string of clear liquid between their mouths. Dean’s eyes are just as hooded as his own as he lifts a thumb to slowly drag over Sam’s mouth, pushing all of the mess between his lips. Sam meets Dean’s eyes and moves his tongue to meet Dean’s thumb, closing his lips around the digit and sucking lightly. Dean bites down on his own lip and pushes his thumb in Sam’s mouth and watches as Sam sucks it clean.

“Jesus Christ, baby,” Dean whispers as he drags his thumb out slowly, pulling at Sam’s bottom lip. Sam licks his lips again and grins. Dean gives him a half-smirk and a look like he doesn’t believe Sam’s real. Dean shakes his head and leans back down for another kiss, a chaste and sweet one this time. “You’re a pain in the ass.”

A laugh bubbles up in Sam’s chest and he shakes his head back at Dean. “Shut up.” Dean laughs in return and pecks his lips quickly before rolling onto his side and scooting up to the head of the bed.

Dean holds his arm open for Sam to fit against his side, and their limbs tangle together comfortably. Sam hums and cozies into his spot, breathing in his favorite smell. Dean’s arms wrap around his shoulders and hug him to his chest. Dean kisses the top of Sam’s head softly before he rests his chin in the same spot. “Sorry I ripped your panties, Sam.”

Sam grins and shrugs. “That’s okay. I have plenty more.” He’d actually forgotten about the torn blue lace still dangling loosely from his knee. Sam reaches down and slides them the rest of the way off, tossing them aside.

“Yeah, but they _were_ really nice.” Sam shrugs again and closes his eyes, feeling himself get lulled to sleep by the sound of Dean’s heartbeat. “I’ll take you to buy a new pair tomorrow.”

Sam hums contentedly. “Sounds good, Dean.” Sam listens to Dean’s even breathing for a few minutes, silently wondering if it would still ruin the night if he asked about Dean’s injuries. Sam clears his throat and decides to do it anyways. “Hey, Dean?”

“Yeah, baby,” his brother answers quietly.

“Are you gonna tell me what happened to your eye?” Dean’s chest rises and falls with a sigh as he pauses. “Was it Dad?”

“No. No, Sam, it wasn’t Dad.” Dean takes another breath and cozies closer to Sam, making himself comfortable on the bed. “I just, uh… Ran into a situation with this other hunter. He was being an ass, and I don’t know… I just couldn’t hold back. I started the fight, and he got a few licks in, but that’s alright. You think this is bad, you should’a seen him.” An uneasy feeling sits in the pit of Sam’s stomach- the queasy uncertainty of never knowing if Dean’s going to make it home at all, let alone in one piece- and he feels himself saddened by the fact that he can’t be there as backup for Dean. Dean thinks his little brother is weak and is the one that needs to be protected, but Sam would jump in front of a bullet for Dean without thinking twice. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do for Dean, and he wishes Dean could see that. “Sammy?” Sam hums in response. “You okay?”

Sam sighs and shakes his head. “What do you want me to say, Dean? Of course I’m not okay. I just…” Sam sits up and clenches his jaw, biting down all the words he wants to say but doesn’t know how to phrase. Dean’s hand remains anchored on his lower back, expression patient and calm. Even that kinda pisses Sam off. How could he not understand how frustrated Sam is? Sam chews on his bottom lip and runs a hand through his hair. Finally, he meets Dean’s eyes head on. “How can you be so reckless, man? What if something happens and- and…” Sam shakes his head, letting the words die on his tongue. Dean’s expression tenses a little, but his hand runs small, soothing circles on Sam’s lower back. “I just wish you would care about yourself a little bit. Or stay here, you know you could stay here with me, Dean. We could live a normal life and everything.”

Dean lets out a deep sigh and his eyes fall, jaw clenching momentarily. “I can’t stay here, Sam. What am I gonna do? I’m a hunter. It’s who I am, y’know? I don’t know anything else.”

Sam looks at Dean pleadingly. _How can you not see your self worth?_ “You’re more than a hunter, Dean. You’re smart, you can do anything. Apply to school, you can live here. We’ll make it work.”

It’s the same conversation they have every time Dean comes to Stanford. It always goes the exact same way, but Sam’s still hoping for the day Dean gives in and stays. Deep down, he knows it’s never going to happen, but he still holds out anyways. Dean looks at him in a wordless attempt to get Sam to drop it, but Sam’s stubborn.

Sam feels the same old emotions welling up in his chest and he swallows them back down, along with the words he wants to use to beg Dean to stay. _I love you. I can’t live knowing you’re not safe because I don’t want to think about losing you. I can’t live without you. I’m pathetic and dependent, and I don’t care. Because I love you, Dean, please don’t leave again. It feels like you take a bigger piece of me with you every time you walk out the front door. Please don’t leave._ But he stays silent.

The look in Dean’s eye suggests he knows what Sam wants to say, and Sam thinks Dean wants to say them, too, but it’s hard enough as it is. The words would only make it that much harder. Sam can feel the beginnings of a tear well up under his cheeks and he finally caves in and gives Dean a weak half-smile. Dean lays on his back and pulls Sam down with him, holding Sam’s head against his chest. Sam lets Dean hold him and wraps his arms around Dean’s waist, squeezing tightly. Dean breathes against the top of Sam’s head and runs his hands down Sam’s arms and back soothingly. Sam closes his eyes and tries to pretend that if he holds on tight enough, Dean won’t ever have to leave from this exact spot.

Dean presses a tender, lingering kiss to Sam’s forehead and Sam lets it ease his worries. “I’ll be okay, Sammy,” Dean whispers into his hair quietly. “I’ll always come back.”

Sam looks up at Dean and rests his chin on Dean’s chest. “Promise?”

Dean holds out his pinky and Sam’s lips twitch into a smile. He links his big brother’s pinky with his own and watches as Dean pulls it up to his face and kisses where their fingers lock together. “Promise.” Dean smiles a soft smile that nobody else in the world besides Sam ever gets to see, and Sam tilts his face up to press their lips together. The softness of the kiss could put the flutter of a butterfly’s wings to shame, but it’s heavy with the weight of over twenty years of feelings. The brothers part their lips and let their foreheads rest together, sharing the moment of wordless understanding.

After the moment, Dean runs a hand over Sam’s hair. “So,” Sam starts with a small smile on his face. “I can pick out any pair of panties I want?”

Dean chuckles. “Any pair you want.” Sam grins again and Dean shakes his head fondly, kissing Sam’s forehead briefly. “Pain in my ass, little brother.”

Feeling as comforted as he’s going to feel, Sam sits up enough to reach for the blanket at the foot of the bed and Dean leans over to the nightstand to blow out the candles. The boys resettle in a familiar spot that’s been a constant comfort in both of their lives. They lay facing each other, their arms wrapped around the other brother and Sam’s head tucked under Dean’s chin. Their entire bodies press and intertwine together like they always have and always will- no matter if Sam grows until he’s a hundred feet tall, like Dean always said. Because some things never change.


End file.
